Chris Alpha

Whiney Stephanie Hefe Alpha

Distant Memory Hazy Ipa Alpha

Mortal Bloom Alpha

You should've seen the cashier's face when she rang up my bird seed and I asked how long it took them to grow

KBS Spicy Chocolate (2023) Alpha

Citrus Squall Alpha

KBS Blueberry Alpha

Nitro Rübæus Alpha

AI is going to take over writing about how AI is going to take over.

Citrus Squall Alpha

Fog is down to earth clouds

All Day IPA Alpha

Chocolate Cherry KBS Alpha

You only need one witness to prove a murder but need at least two witnesses to prove a wedding. It clarifies which one is more dangerous.

60 Minute IPA Alpha

60 Minute IPA Alpha

Crimson Cru Alpha

Our finger fitting perfectly in our nostrils must be an evolutionary prank

4 Giants IPA (2022) Alpha

On the whole, humans are generally good. The problem is that we can be convinced that evil is good.

Canadian Breakfast Stout 2019 Alpha

When you go food shopping, you are buying supplies for this week's poops.

KBS Maple Mackinac Fudge (2022) Alpha

KBS Maple Mackinac Fudge Alpha

Millennials are the only generation to have to teach both their parents and children not to believe everything they read online

Mango Magnifico Alpha

The HBO opening logo screen with the staticky background probably makes no sense to anyone under the age of 30.

Bottle Shop Belgian Twist Alpha

Nemesis (2021) Alpha

House parties for highschool kids are probably a lot harder to pull off ever since Ring doorbells became a thing.

Bottle Shop Series Highball Drifter Alpha

All Day IPA Alpha

Every shoe you buy is buy-one-get-one-free.

All Day Vacay Alpha

If the large intestine is the colon the small intestine is the semi-colon.

Green Zebra Alpha

All Day IPA Alpha

Utopias Barrel - Aged World Wide Stout (2021) Alpha

Glasses make you look smart, but you have to fail a test to get them.

Four Giants And the Haze of Destiny Alpha

KBS Hazelnut Alpha

When a computer over heats it freezes

Nitro KBS Alpha

Procrastination is a good thing. You'll always have something to do tomorrow and nothing to do today

All Day IPA Alpha

KBS Espresso (2021) Alpha

When you grow up you find out that 10k is a lot to owe but not a lot to own.

Panther Cub (2021) Alpha

Unraveled IPA Alpha

There is a certain sense of accomplishment that comes from mining a particularly large booger.

Centennial IPA Alpha

Punkin Ale Alpha

Breakfast Stout Alpha

Before you open your mouth to speak, make sure it's an improvement upon the silence.

Rübæus Alpha

The people who are ugly about restaurants being slow due to no staff are the people who made the staff quit to begin with.

4 Giants IPA (2021) Alpha

Shit is both a noun, verb and adjective

All Day IPA Alpha

If "It is what it is", then it stands to reason that "It isn't what it aint"

All Day IPA Alpha

Almost always, the dread of doing a task is worse than the actual doing of the task.

Unraveled IPA Alpha

When you buy and eat part of a chicken, you're actually secretly sharing a meal with someone you probably don't know

All Day IPA Alpha

When you take 1 away from 2, you have 1, but when you take 1 choice away from 2 choices, you have no choice.

Juicy Hazey IPA Alpha

90 Minute Imperial IPA Alpha

Chickens being the Tuna of the Land doesn't have the same ring to it.

Más Agave Alpha

Louis Vuitton missed a big opportunity not sponsoring Super Bowl LV

Big Lushious Alpha

You can’t stand backwards on stairs

Big Luscious (2020) Alpha

If elevators displayed your weight when you stepped in, you'd probably be more likely to take the stairs.

Porter Alpha

“Cowboy” sounds really manly and cool, but the arguably more accurate “Horseboy” sounds really stupid

All Day IPA Alpha

Sometimes when someone says “10 years ago” it still feels like that’s the mid 90s